Singer breaks down in tears over his late bandmate in moving scenes on show Pilgrimage. Jay, 34, sobbed during a conversation with comedian , 70, and said afterwards: "I cried more than I've ever cried."
Jay had to take a break during filming to sob in private. He told Helen: "I need to have a little cry in the toilet." after revealing to fans in 2020 that he had an inoperable brain tumour.
On whether he talked to his fellow singer, he said after filming: "I have, yes? it's a conversation which [will] always be coloured by the question of, like, 'Can you even hear this?' While he was sick, I definitely had moments that I would say I prayed, and then when he passed away I sort of felt like, 'I wonder if he can hear me now'.
"I felt that did really sort of ignite a lot of questions that I've left unanswered, and in some ways, I know I'm searching for that catharsis. I'm really open to the idea there's something out there.
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"If we do all go into some global consciousness... God or whatever, then Tom would be there, and I'd be able to speak to him, but whether he can speak back is another question."
The show, Pilgrimage: The Road Through the Alps, is an ideal way for Jay to explore questions about faith.
In the three-part BBC Two show, Jay joins presenter, 45, Helen, winner , 24, comedian Daliso Chaponda, 45, Paralympic athlete Stefanie Reid, 40, and journalist Nelufar Hedayat, 37. Together, they walk nearly 186 miles from Austria to Einsiedeln Abbey in Switzerland over 12 days.
Jay, raised in Nottinghamshire in an Irish Catholic family, said: "I agreed to go on this Pilgrimage because it just sounded the perfect thing to do. The rule book that comes with being a Catholic is too judgmental for where I am. I think the closest I can get to what I am, would be considered agnostic. I don't believe there is a God, and I don't believe there isn't."
Jay, in The Wanted with Tom plus , and, added: "But I would love to know a little bit more about what I am. So, I'm looking forward to that."
The celebs are at one stage seen traversing a snow-capped mountain during the hit show.
Speaking to the last week,
He said: "You wouldn't want a pilgrimage to be easy, would you? If we're going to be pilgrims and kind of re-enact what thousands of people have done over the ages ahead of us, then we want to face a little bit of adversity, and you can always guarantee the weather will provide you with a little bit of that." The shared purpose helped the celebs open up with one another.
"Inevitably we got to know each other really well, as you can't talk about religion and spirituality without talking about life itself and the experiences that you've had," he says.
Pilgrimage: The Road Through the Alps, airs over three nights from April 20-22 at 9pm on BBC Two & iPlayer.
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